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Jane Eyre-第112章

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 necessary documents。”

here was a new card turned up! it is a fine thing; reader; to be lifted in a moment from indigence to wealth—a very fine thing; but not a matter one can prehend; or consequently enjoy; all at once。 and then there are other chances in life far more thrilling and rapture…giving: this is solid; an affair of the actual world; nothing ideal about it: all its associations are solid and sober; and its manifestations are the same。 one does not jump; and spring; and shout hurrah! at hearing one has got a fortune; one begins to consider responsibilities; and to ponder business; on a base of steady satisfaction rise certain grave cares; and we contain ourselves; and blood over our bliss with a solemn brow。

besides; the words legacy; bequest; go side by side with the words; death; funeral。 my uncle i had heard was dead—my only relative; ever since being made aware of his existence; i had cherished the hope of one day seeing him: now; i never should。 and then this money came only to me: not to me and a rejoicing family; but to my isolated self。 it was a grand boon doubtless; and independence would be glorious—yes; i felt that—that thought swelled my heart。

“you unbend your forehead at last;” said mr。 rivers。 “i thought medusa had looked at you; and that you were turning to stone。 perhaps now you will ask how much you are worth?”

“how much am i worth?”

“oh; a trifle! nothing of course to speak of—twenty thousand pounds; i think they say—but what is that?”

“twenty thousand pounds?”

here was a new stunner—i had been calculating on four or five thousand。 this news actually took my breath for a moment: mr。 st。 john; whom i had never heard laugh before; laughed now。

“well;” said he; “if you had mitted a murder; and i had told you your crime was discovered; you could scarcely look more aghast。”

“it is a large sum—don’t you think there is a mistake?”

“no mistake at all。”

“perhaps you have read the figures wrong—it may be two thousand!”

“it is written in letters; not figures;—twenty thousand。”

i again felt rather like an individual of but average gastronomical powers sitting down to feast alone at a table spread with provisions for a hundred。 mr。 rivers rose now and put his cloak on。

“if it were not such a very wild night;” he said; “i would send hannah down to keep you pany: you look too desperately miserable to be left alone。 but hannah; poor woman! could not stride the drifts so well as i: her legs are not quite so long: so i must e’en leave you to your sorrows。 good…night。”

he was lifting the latch: a sudden thought occurred to me。 “stop one minute!” i cried。

“well?”

“it puzzles me to know why mr。 briggs wrote to you about me; or how he knew you; or could fancy that you; living in such an out…of…the… way place; had the power to aid in my discovery。”

“oh! i am a clergyman;” he said; “and the clergy are often appealed to about odd matters。” again the latch rattled。

“no; that does not satisfy me!” i exclaimed: and indeed there was something in the hasty and unexplanatory reply which; instead of allaying; piqued my curiosity more than ever。

“it is a very strange piece of business;” i added; “i must know more about it。”

“another time。”

“no; to…night!—to…night!” and as he turned from the door; i placed myself between it and him。 he looked rather embarrassed。

“you certainly shall not go till you have told me all;” i said。

“i would rather not just now。”

“you shall!—you must!”

“i would rather diana or mary informed you。”

of course these objections wrought my eagerness to a climax: gratified it must be; and that without delay; and i told him so。

“but i apprised you that i was a hard man;” said he; “difficult to persuade。”

“and i am a hard woman;—impossible to put off。”

“and then;” he pursued; “i am cold: no fervour infects me。”

“whereas i am hot; and fire dissolves ice。 the blaze there has thawed all the snow from your cloak; by the same token; it has streamed on to my floor; and made it like a trampled street。 as you hope ever to be forgiven; mr。 rivers; the high crime and misdemeanour of spoiling a sanded kitchen; tell me what i wish to know。”

“well; then;” he said; “i yield; if not to your earnestness; to your perseverance: as stone is worn by continual dropping。 besides; you must know some day;—as well now as later。 your name is jane eyre?”

“of course: that was all settled before。”

“you are not; perhaps; aware that i am your namesake?—that i was christened st。 john eyre rivers?”

“no; indeed! i remember now seeing the letter e。 prised in your initials written in books you have at different times lent me; but i never asked for what name it stood。 but what then? surely—”

i stopped: i could not trust myself to entertain; much less to express; the thought that rushed upon me—that embodied itself;— that; in a second; stood out a strong; solid probability。 circumstances knit themselves; fitted themselves; shot into order: the chain that had been lying hitherto a formless lump of links was drawn out straight;—every ring was perfect; the connection plete。 i knew; by instinct; how the matter stood; before st。 john had said another word; but i cannot expect the reader to have the same intuitive perception; so i must repeat his explanation。

“my mother’s name was eyre; she had two brothers; one a clergyman; who married miss jane reed; of gateshead; the other; john eyre; esq。; merchant; late of funchal; madeira。 mr。 briggs; being mr。 eyre’s solicitor; wrote to us last august to inform us of our uncle’s death; and to say that he had left his property to his brother the clergyman’s orphan daughter; overlooking us; in consequence of a quarrel; never forgiven; between him and my father。 he wrote again a few weeks since; to intimate that the heiress was lost; and asking if we knew anything of her。 a name casually written on a slip of paper has enabled me to find her out。 you know the rest。” again he was going; but i set my back against the door。

“do let me speak;” i said; “let me have one moment to draw breath and reflect。” i paused—he stood before me; hat in hand; looking posed enough。 i resumed—

“your mother was my father’s sister?”

“yes。”

“my aunt; consequently?”

he bowed。

“my uncle john was your uncle john? you; diana; and mary are his sister’s children; as i am his brother’s child?”

“undeniably。”

“you three; then; are my cousins; half our blood on each side flows from the same source?”

“we are cousins; yes。”

i surveyed him。 it seemed i had found a brother: one i could be proud of;—one i could love; and two sisters; whose qualities were such; that; when i knew them but as mere strangers; they had inspired me with genuine affection and admiration。 the two girls; on whom; kneeling down on the wet ground; and looking through the low; latticed window of moor house kitchen; i had gazed with so bitter a mixture of interest and despair; were my near kinswomen; and the young and stately gentleman who had found me almost dying at his threshold was my blood relation。 glorious discovery to a l
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